When Media Attacks

Interesting writeup at Church Marketing Sucks about ways churches can deal with potentially troubling reports cropping up in mainstream media.

It specifically addressed the recent issues faced by Ed Young and Fellowship Church. A local news station did an exclusive report which detailed what it considered excess on the part of Pastor Young and Fellowship.

Now, in the interest of fair disclosure, I like Ed Young, and not just because of the wonderful marital challenges he puts out from time to time *deep smile*. No, I truly, honestly believe he is a committed kingdom worker.

From a personal standpoint, I like the way he and church leadership decided to deal with the issue.

Now, I think it is important to understand that the media is not to blame here. Well, not necessarily. Yep, we know sometimes the headline is juicier than the truth, but there is nothing wrong with a little public oversight. I think when we, as churches, truly work to line up our ethics with God's expectations, we'll be above reproach. Mistakes do happen, and it is never fun to see you or your church beaten up in the news, but I think the proper response (seeking God's face, coming to ensure financial fidelity, reporting to your congregation, etc.) can go a long, long way.

One more thing... I always smile when I see folks to potshots at church works and their wealth. I won't discount true issues of shameless excess, but, as I posted in the comments, lavishness is relative.

Just sayin'.

BTW, Check out Church Marketing Sucks... awesome informational blog that I love to visit.

Read more »

Heroes: David Benke

Since I work with middle school and high school students, any and all stories of school violence hit close to my heart.

So, when reports surfaced today about a man going on a shooting rampage in a middle school just three miles away from the tragic Columbine school shooting, my heart skipped a beat.

Pray for our young people. Pray for our "older" people.

Thank God for David Benke.

Read more »

Weekend

What a weekend.

Since somebody decided to leave me with two of the kids this weekend, I had a taste of despair.

I tried the "popular dad" routine to kick things off. You know... saying yes to everything. That lasted roughly 15 minutes, right after my son loudly proclaimed the joy of freeing his nether regions from an invading piece of clothing to the patrons of a packed Chik-fil-A. Talk about embarrassed.

Then it was off to dinner with friends, and I didn't make it back home till past midnight. I figured they'd be tired. But no.

"Daddy, can we watch cartoons?"

"No," I yelled. What was wrong with these jokers? It was already "tomorrow."

"Pleeeease?"

Okay. Fine. Whatever.

Suffice to say, since I had a game to coach at Boiling Springs the next day (70 miles away), followed by a second one 60 miles from the first, we were in for a burner.

I am proud to say we got to Boiling Springs early. So early, in fact, that I found out that I had driven there in error. The Boiling Springs game was not till the next day.

I had driven an hour and change for nothing. Plus, I had two "are-we-there-yet" kids that I now had to drive back to get to a game that was fairly close to home in Charlotte. Goodness.

"This would never have happened with Mommy," opined by daughter sagely.

"I bet Mommy would never leave you on the side of the road either, would she?" I shot back in a mature manner.

Anyway... I coached my 96s (U-13s) and we tied the game with 10 players. The U-11 game did not go as well, and we lost badly.

I had two games Sunday, so we left for Boiling Springs. Again. Now that game, we lost. Again we played with 10 players. As always, my Torsion girls are my heroes. They never, ever quit.

My U-11s made it all worth it it in our second game.

We played a team I truly liked. Nice coach, nice young ladies, nice club. They had beaten us last year, and in this game, we were missing some key players due to conflicts.

Keep in mind we had not won a game as a team. We went up 3-0, and prevailed in what turned out to be a nail-biter 3-2.

Really, really proud of you, Samba Elite!

The wife and baby returned on Sunday, and all is right in my world...

Read more »

Don't Call me Pastor!

Okay, this is a tickler from my dear friend Pastor Hey Man Dude Derek.

I am seriously thinking of referring to my father-in-law as "Dude Sam." Pray for me.

Read more »

Retrusting God

A few weeks ago, I was coasting on a high. Things were really looking up; everything was pretty much lining up. More and more doors seemed to be opening simultaneously.

Then, the floor dropped out.

My nephew Nate, one of the sweetest kids you could ever hope to know, was diagnosed with a cancerous tumor in his brain. All this while going to hospital for something else

I have four nephews, all of whom I love dearly, and Nate is the youngest. Same age, in fact, as my son. The two of them are road dawgs; whenever they are together, you can count on joint operations of a destructive kind. We (the parents) always wondered how two 3-yr-olds could wreak so much havoc.

When the tumor was found, I went numb, and wrapped myself in the supposedly proper male facade of silent strength. My wife was devastated, and holding her while she cried allowed me to hide the condensation that immediately formed in my own eyes.

I prayed. We prayed. But somehow, the lump in my throat would not leave. At night, I cried. And the cycle repeated every day. Public prayer, and private tears, followed by more prayer and a few more tears

And then I became angry. I had reason to be, right? Forget the stuff I taught my youth for a quick second; I could divest myself of faith for a little bit... right? Right?!

Why did my nephew have to go through this? What did his parents do? Why did my boy have to have this dangerous mass pressing into his brain? WHY? Tell me... why. I have EVERY right to be angry and mad and infuriated. And helpless. And a little bit lower than optimal on the faith-o-meter.

No.

I'm gonna see this one through. I am gonna see my nephew win this. I am gonna be able to hold him again. I am gonna see him go through chemo, and probably get tired, maybe nauseous... but I am gonna see him beat this. Because I know, I believe that there is power in prayer, and that the God we serve is a God that still makes miracles happen. And every tear shed (like the ones dripping now) are just precursors to the tears of joy we'll be shedding on the other side of trial.

I am going to retrust God. I admit it may have to do with the fact that I have nothing else, but now that I am on this path, I'm in all the way.

Pray for my nephew, please. You'll be doing yourself a favor; you will want to know that you were part of this miracle, so get to it.

Love ya, nephew!

Read more »

WIB (repost)

So, we talked about what you need to do as a minority person trying to fit in a new age, predominantly white church. As promised, I will examine the other side.

Now, now... don't trick yourself into thinking that this scenario is impossible. What happens if you get called to speak at a black church? Or, even worse, you are asked to keynote a (gasp!) Black History Month symposium? (BHM is in February, BTW).

So, because I am the nice guy I claim to be, I have created a cheat sheet for those who need an empirical reference when faced with such scary situations.

1) The Entry/Welcome: Jeans? Please tell me you are kidding. If you don't have a suit, don't attend. Dress for church as you would a funeral. Think of the Boy Scouts motto.

2) Welcome pt II: When elderly Sister Johnson tells you to come give her sugar immediately "or else" you better go give her sugar. She will swat you. Hard

3) You see those paper fans that have MLK Jr's likeness on them? Leave them alone. They are for parents with kids. And Sister Johnson. See above.

4) Careful with the Amens. Don't be too loud. Don't be too soft. Definitely don't scream. A double Amen means no other Amens should follow. And please don't pump your fist in the air. That could be misconstrued if you were not at the Olympics in the 1960s. If in doubt, study a Kirk Franklin outro for examples of correct refrains (like "preach, preacher!").

5) Praise and worship: If the choir and congregation break into an old Negro Spiritual, I highly advise you not to join in. In fact, that would be a great time to use the bathroom. If restrained, just nod with understanding and shut up.

6) Yes, that is portrait of a Black Jesus. And? Let it go. Don't stare. Let sleeping dogs lie.

7) Remember what I said about no fist bumps? Same applies here. No daps, hood hugs or anything that you saw on BET or the WB.

8) Eat a HEAVY breakfast. There won't be donuts. Service will be LONG. You will be hungry.

9) Offering: The offering plate does not come to you; you get up and go to it. Nuff said. The seeker-friendly movement will arrive eventually.

10) You saw right... that was a modesty blanket, and yes, they are used on men as well.

Sent via my BlackBerry.

Read more »

Church Super Bowl Ad

Interesting blurb... we might see a megachurch run a Super Bowl ad. Funnily enough, it's one of the finalists in a spoof contest.

Culturally, this is big; as the article notes, it would be a huge platform. Christ in prime time? This is even bigger than that concept.

Read more »

The Inspiration Currently Known as Bree

I latched on to this story from David Whitley via FanHouse, and I hope it touches you as much as it touched me.

It tells the story of Bree McMahon, a senior at Freedom High School in Orlando, Florida, who overcame an event that would crush almost anyone else.

The varsity soccer player lost her leg.

The manner was excruciatingly tragic. While at a carwash fundraiser for the soccer team, a fellow player hit the gas pedal in a vehicle by mistake and pinned Bree to the wall.

But, as Whitley notes, the SUV left Bree's spirit unscathed.

Now, I cannot tell this story better than David Whitley, and I am not gonna try; all I can say is I wish God will bless me with the a percentage of the grace that this 17 yr-old possesses, so much so that while waiting in pain for the ambulance to arrive, she was able to tell her despondent teammate how much she loved her and how she understood it was an accident.

As a former keeper, there are few people I think can EVER score on me. We cultivate that confidence. Mia Hamm is one person I am wary of. I admit it.

Bree, when Mia Hamm says you are her hero, that it big time. And I just wanna say, you are mine too.

Here's to #12... what an honor to hear of your story. What an honor to have you play Joga Bonito, and what an honor to see the courage you displayed when you took the field, crutches and prosthesis and all, a beautiful example of the character I'd love to see in my own players... and myself.

Image courtesy of Orlando Sentinel/FanHouse.

Read more »

Ignored tweet leads to arrest

While reading this PC World story, one element leaped out at at me.

While trying to disperse a rowdy tween crowd that had converged to listen to a scheduled singing event of a teen sensation, the police arrested the music exec associated with the singer. What for?

For not tweeting a dispersal message.

The police hold that it was reckless to do so, and that his (the exec's) refusal contributed to injury.

While I don't understand the legal nuances, I couldn't help but think that the police in this story have an overly ambitious idea of Twitter in this scenario...

Read more »

That time of year.

Busy, busy, busy... and grateful, grateful, grateful. Most of the time, at least.

Just felt I should say that... carry on... :)

Read more »

Olive Tree Bible Software updated...

Olive Tree has put out some nice updates on their Bible software.

Olive Tree makes electronic versions of biblical material -- along with related content -- for every major smartphone and PDA platform, which means you're good on Android, Symbian, iPhone, Palm and BlackBerry. In addition, they have a bunch of free resources (like Bible reading schedules) that are useful for everyone.

Specifically for BlackBerry, it seems they have expanded on the capabilities of both touchscreen and keypad/QWERTY devices.

There are live discounts available for software titles.

Check them out. Bible Reader is a mainstay on my device, and has been a true blessing in my life.

Read more »

Who teaches you ethics?

This article from David Knowles stuck with me. The original case was one which stood out in the national consciousness, and it had everyone's moral compass firing North.

I admit it: I think Ms Davis may have point. They are paying him to talk about ethics?

Oh well... wow. I'd probably be more willing to pay Ms Davis for a speech at this point, but then again, I don't roll in the circles that Harvard folks do.

Read more »

Disciples, disciples...

While working in the corporate world, my boss had a novel thing to say about his abilities. His worth -- as a trainer of personnel -- was the quantity of his own people that, in our corporate parlance, "moved up". In other words, his abilities as a supervisor were directly proportional to the number of his own subordinates that could do his job after a reasonable period of time.

Now, I know it is easy to draw flack nowadays for referring to the church as a corporate entity. Indeed, I happen to humbly think that church leaders should concentrate a little more on being busy with the gospel as opposed to the business of the gospel... but that is a discussion for another day.

There does seem to be a basic idea that seems to be lost in this new age of leadership. Where are all the disciples?

Discipleship seems to be a lost concept, one which just seems to be overlooked.

In our younger christians, the effects seem telling. It seems we are seeing a new generation of young adults. They are jazzy, up-tempo, have more than just a passing knowledge of Christ, but have no urge to speak of it. College (and later on, life) becomes one big field of landmines because we did not accompany the cool activities with any depth. We developed a population of Christ Followers Lite who know the hooks to alternative gospel but really never learned how quiet time is important.

What happened to discipleship?

We are culpable. I think this is a critical juncture, and we MUST rethink our course. We need to decide if we are gonna continue to pump up these new believers with frills or help them shape their faith. We need to allow ourselves to be used to help create the type of christians who can and will do the continuous job of propagating the gospel.

Just some food for thought. Thoughts?

Read more »

Should Churches Monitor Staff’s Twitter?

Here is an interesting philosophical discussion from Pastor Pete Wilson of Cross Point Church in Nashville.

Against the backdrop of Larry Johnson's infamous tweets, Pete asks a question: should churches monitor the social networking feeds of their staffers?

I tend to lean towards light on the "m" word, heavy on the "c" (connection). In these days and times, there is nothing like too much accountability. Truth is, what we do online (blogging, tweeting, FB, Tokboxing, etc) are all representative of our ministries. Like it or not, people perceive them as representative of Jesus Christ.

What do you think?

Read more »

My pastor can beat up your pastor.

Welcome to the age of the celebrity pastor.

We've always had popular men of the cloth. The advent of social networking simply helps make them viral.

The results can be funny. I overheard two acquaintances going back and forth about how awesome their respective pastors where. Various major points were compared, from hair gel to mobile device.
Finally, one of the debaters threw down his trump card. "My pastor can do a split!"

At this point, I had to interrupt. I needed to agree... his pastor was cool. A pastor who does splits? Incredible. I felt inadequate and unfulfilled, and made a mental note to request the same from our pastor during the next church event.

Looking back, I wonder why I did not have the presence of mind to ask for an in-depth reason as to why his pastor did a split in the first place. Then again, it was probably best left unsaid. In any case, this pastor had achieved celebrity status on account of his proficiency of a move that defined MC Hammer.

The hushed, reverential tones of congregants when mentioning their pastor is a clear sign. You live where? Have you heard Reverend so and so? No? GOODNESS!

Makes you wanna raise a lighter to the sky.

It isn't only pastors. Lately, it seems the church (I use the term collectively) is eager to bestow the term "believer" on any famous person that utters the word "God" in any public forum. The problem here is obvious; this includes even the most hedonistic stars that win at awards shows and every artist facing felony charges. Look on the cover of some of your favorite christian magazine for proof.

Celebrities rule.

Of course, the real danger is when the messenger becomes greater than the Message. Is modern christianity being driven by personality cults? Do we treasure the trend more than the substance?
We live in an age where we are all addicted to sizzle. We like the famous, and want to be like them. We allegedly unmoor balloons with imaginary children in them in order to get reality shows. Why should the church be any different?

Except for one small fact: it should. And we need to reevaluate our motives, because if I see any pastors making any homemade devices that can float, I refuse to visit that church.

Stay blessed!

Balloon pic courtesy of AP.
Sent via BlackBerry

Read more »

Scary!!!!

Here is an unvarnished quick-hitter from my friend Duncan.

The illicit sex slave destroys the lives of way too many people. Maybe it's time we started paying attention.

Too many people are victims, and we cannot stand aside and let human trafficking continue.

Read more »

Face it..

Universal truth time:

Your teen is gonna network socially. Okay?

Now, what are you, as a parent or youthworker, gonna do about it? How about harnessing it?

I think they are fantastic outlets, and can really be used to develop existing bonds. I do tend to lean towards being a hardliner when it comes to supervision.

If you're child won't let you have unbarred access to it, they shouldn't have the medium. Period.

Even better... why don't you have your networking identity and "friend" your child? It's a win for all.

Just some food for thought...

Read more »

The good, the bad and the insane.

Innovation is the name of the game at church nowadays.

You have to have an angle, something that pumps up the crowd, and no only keeps the congregants coming, but encourages them to invite friends and family to come see.

Some ideas are worse than others, and so I have taken it upon myself to write an abbreviated guide to help churches figure out a few ideas to roll with, and a few too discard. I have four (4) grades:

• Winner! (This is cool, everfresh and can't be faded).
• Good (worth trying, but look left, right and left again before implementing).
• Fail! (I wouldn't do it, unless I was trying out for a dysfunctional reality show.)
• The Benny (dedicated to my good friend Tee; this is "Fail to the nth power" {where n equals infinity}. I have taken the liberty to use a graphical illustration to denote The Benny).
  

1) Donuts and coffee
Grade: Good.
Reason: 10 years a go, you could build mega churches on this alone. Now, it is almost expected. With proper fellowship, it is effective. Do not try to save money by going for saltines and sweet tea.


2) Online resourcing
Grade: Winner!
Reason: Uh, Duh... meet the needs of the people in the prevalent medium. No-brainer. Website, Twitter account, FaceBook page... whatever. If there is a void, fill it.


3) Social Networking
Grade: Winner!
Reason: see above, my friend; see above.

4) Fundraising car washes with teens in bikinis

Grade: The Benny
Reason: the image says it all. Fail, fail, FAIL!!! I wish I had a coat big enough to beat you all with simultaneously. What were you thinking? Why? It's a church fundraiser, not a casting call for Baywatch.

When your programming starts to require parental advisory labels, it's time to step back and reevaluate your goals.



5) Civil War reenactments
Grade: Fail!
Reason: C'mon. Do you really have to ask? C'mon. Some cultural experiences are best left outside the church. What next, a stage reenactment of The Alamo or The Battle of The Bulge (the musical)? Just stop. C'mon.


6) Hospital/Infirm Ministry
Grade: Winner!
Reason: This one gets the overlooked award. Nothing screams "caring" more than pastoral staff and/or congregants willing to fellowship with folks in hospital or at home. Hospitals are sterile and cold; visitations provide warmth. Old school? Our Lord spent more than a little time with the sick and infirm. Let's copy that.


7) Church Stickers and bumper magnets.
Grade: Good.
Reason: I like it, but tread carefully, friends. We have all heard of the pastor who was cut off in traffic by a car he didn't recognize (but which had his church's big, glossy sticker on the bumper). When the pastor blasted his horn (actually being more friendly than confrontational), he was answered with three upraised middle fingers, from the driver's side, passenger and a rear windows. All together.

The pastor pulled close at the next light and was astonished by the glare he got from one of the church deacons, the deacon's wife and son. The glare turned into a look of meek shame, of course.

While it makes for a great opportunity to reshuffle your deacon board, one fundamental truth stands out: if you live by the sticker/magnet, you (or more accurately, your church's reputation) can die by the sticker/magnet. Overall church health first, frills later.


8) The special "offering staff" relay.
Grade: The Benny

Reason: Call me stuffy, but giving each family that makes $1000 offerings a special, faux-bling-encrusted staff to run around the church on Sunday makes me uncomfortable. Granted, I do admit to wondering how it would feel, since, as the eldest son, it would have been my right to run the staff on my family's behalf.

No, I am not making this up.

I need a coat...


9) Bibles. No... really... physical Bibles.
Grade: Winner!
Reason: Wanna know what the most important thing a new disciple needs? Same thing that a tenured, seasoned Christ-follower needs: a bible. Yes, I myself am a huge proponent of electronic resources, but sometimes, nothing is more reassuring than an old-fashioned, tried and true physical bible. Have some available. In the sanctuary. In the dining area. In the vestibule.

Read more »

People I Dislike: Kimberly Thompson

When it comes to life, the toughest thing sometimes is just living. It takes a deep immersion in faith to get to a point where you can do it well, and do it with an "overall" smile.

Some folks do it better than others. And this is one reason I dislike 180 pal Kimberly Thompson.

Kimmie (who she is to me) is a special kind of person... she makes me question why I would ever stay glum. She has this thing about her that makes me ashamed to be down.

So, why do I dislike Kimmie? Too many reasons to count. Here are a few:

- When asked about her outlook on life, she answers with: "To sound incredibly cliche, life is what you make of it." I don't like people who can get profound points across so concisely.

- When you ask her how she finds a way to be positive, she comes back with: "By knowing that I serve a God who is faithful, and ultimately everything will work together for for my good." Since I sometimes struggle with this, you can see how she gets on my nerves.

- You get the same grounded answer when you ask her what biblical verses she uses to anchor herself: "'I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me' is always a good pick-me-up."

Even with all this, I was willing to give Kimmie a pass. The answer to my last question pretty much sealed the deal and put her squarely in the "Dislike" category:

- What do you think of Karen Byrne? "She is awesomeness and you know it!!!!" She really used 4 exclamation marks.

Whatever.

On a more lucid day, I could talk about how wonderful it is to communicate with someone with such an undisguised love for God. I'd say how cool it is to have an instant prayer partner, and how Kimmie is an inspirational friend that I hold dear.

But, that last answer bothers me, and so I simply won't say that stuff.

Read more »

One week with Malena

To all our friends and family,

Thank you... for all the flowers, thoughts, wishes and especially the diapers.

Malena has had a blessed first week.

Read more »